More Autobiography

First, I just want to say that Halloween is over, which means that

1. My birthday is a few days away (Sunday)! Turning the big 22 y'all.

2. CHRISTMAS IS HERE!

3. Crap that's all I got.

Also, I went to Stanford over the weekend for my rugby tournament. Drove there all day Friday, played in six games on Saturday, and drove home all day Sunday. My coach brought 30 girls from the team and divided us up into two teams because there were two brackets in the tournament, so each team was in a bracket. Well, we both ended up winning our brackets (my team played six games, our other team played five) and had to play each other in the final game, so either way BYU won. It was great. Never been so beat up in my life. Four girls on our team got concussions (I gave one of the girls a concussion when I tackled her in our final game, and one girl shattered her arm and wrist in one of the previous games--a freak accident, really) BUT, WE ARE THE CHAMPIONS MY FRIENDS.

Well it has been a while since I have put some of my autobiography up (probably because I haven't written anymore of it) so I thought I would like to put something up.

This is the first draft, and it's for you Charley. I am aware that everyone in the family knows this story, BUT it is always good to write these things down.

I title this one...how about...

"Master"

If you are a Mitchell or at least know us Mitchells, you might know that we all have an unhealthy love for candy. In fact, we'll do some pretty pathetic things to get some mere Starbursts. (This next part is unrelated to the rest of the story, but I think it is funny anyway...) I have these memories of Scotty always having big bags of Starbursts. Thankfully Scotty was pretty generous with his candy and would share the wealth with us younger ones. He would pull out a handful of Starbursts from the back and chuck them in the air. You better believe that we all went diving and scrambling to get as many Starbursts as possible. You also better believe that if we ever had candy and chucked them in the air Scotty was doing the diving right along with us.

Anyway...

Charley would bring girls to the house on dates to watch a movie out on the balcony or out on the trampoline. Beforehand he would corner me or Seth or Laura, but more often all three of us, and use bribery to get us to "serve" him while on his date. He took it a step further and said that we had to call him "Master" when we were serving him. If we did this he agreed to give us CANDY which of course caused immediate agreement to the deal along with excessive hyperness.

So Charley would be out on the balcony and he would say something like, "Hey Audrey, will you go get us some popcorn?" And I had to say "Yes, Master" and would then have to go get him some popcorn and serve it to him and his date. I was the best miniature waitress you ever saw. Charley took full advantage of this and would request orange juice and ice cream and this and that, but then one time he said this to me and Laura, "Hey guys, will you go get us a blanket?"

GULP.

So what's so wrong with a blanket? Well, once again, if you are a Mitchell, or at least know us Mitchells, you will also know that we seemed to live our childhoods on the couches watching tv and movies with the same blankets that were probably never washed, but who cares because they were soft and comfortable and warm. But an unwashed blanket that had probably collected many skin particles, been saturated with b.o. and had just been wrapped around some Mitchell body MANY times might be pretty disgusting. And at least Laura and I were civilized enough to know this. So Laura and I found the most promising blanket we could, which of course had not been washed in a while and did still smell kinda musty and probably had stains all over it. But thank goodness for Laura's preteen interest in lots of very pungent body sprays from Bath and Body Works or where ever those came from. We just took some body spray and sprayed it ALL OVER that blanket. The blanket was practically sopping wet with that stuff, but by golly it did not smell like Mitchell laziness anymore.

So we took it out to Charley and his date, feeling triumphant, but even more importantly, excited about getting our candy.

We still to this day have not gotten any candy. Wonder why.